Workplace Safety: Zombie Attack!

Job Safety

Zombies. They’re everywhere and let’s face it, they’re not easy to manage. They’re immortal, what with being dead and all, and sometimes they can be a bad influence on others in the workplace.

Even if it weren’t for their gashed faces and green skin, you can tell a zombie by what they do on site.

Five sure signs of zombie work habits are:

  • Taking unnecessary risks
  • Lacking the capacity to think and problem solve
  • Not wearing their PPE
  • Ignoring common safety hazards
  • Cutting corners and rushing through a job

So how do we contain the infection and stop the zombie worker force from spreading?

One of the major problems with young zombie workers is that they can’t really speak and so are sometimes hesitant to ask questions or report safety hazards that would clearly pose a threat to their living workers.

But managers should remember that while the undead possess an insatiable lust for brains, this rather gruesome habit can be modified to improve workplace safety. How? Instead of eating brains have your zombie feed on knowledge. According to the Canadian Zombie Health & Safety Manual, feeding a zombie knowledge helps provide a safe and accident-free workplace.

Since working with at least one or two zombies is unavoidable, it is the responsibility of the living to wear the appropriate personal protective equipment and provide a positive influence on their undead colleagues.

Unless it’s your hope to grow or join their army of the undead – and we’re guessing it’s not – then the best plan is to make sure zombies adhere to the safety precautions outlined in your training. The living should always lead by example, cast an observant eye at all times, be a team player and enforce safety regulations regardless of the motivations of their zombie workmates.

All living workers are potential mentors for the zombie workforce.

Remember, just because the undead have already faced death once in their existence, doesn’t mean they can’t face it again.

First step? Identify the zombies on your worksite. If you observe a co-worker who has unsafe practices that might endanger you or other life-loving workers, do something. If you are a co-worker, approach the issue with your supervisor. They will tackle the issue with the zombie and help to remind them that their failure to observe safety practices is not tolerated in the world of the living.

If you are a supervisor, contain the virus as quickly as possible or it will infect everyone else.

Creating a safe environment is a team objective that will help prevent the zombie virus from spreading.

Oh, and Happy Halloween!


  1. Thanks for sharing, Dave!

  2. this is really useful for workplace!


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